I'm Broken.

But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:8,9

 

The experience that I've had these past two months have honestly been a true roller coaster. 
Instead of coming out stronger, I came out weaker, more vulnerable and more broken. Instead of battling yo yo diets and body image, it actually made it worse. Now before you start to think that this is because of the Maker's Diet, it's not.


It's because I am so unbelievably broken, and God is my only strength. During this time, God showed me deep rooted things about myself that I had been pushing away for so long. I realized that personally, diets only create more of a problem for me and I need to learn to eat in moderation for God without restricting myself to foods that He provided. The Maker's Diet is an amazing diet and I would recommend it to anyone, but it just wasn't for me. It left me craving more things that I had before I started the diet and overeating more than I had. 

This past week is when I truly gave myself over to God and said that only He can fulfill me. And well guess what? He gave me the strength to eat and do for Him. How faithful and amazing He is. Though I do feel as if I'm worse than where I started, I'm worse in a wonderful way. I'm worse in the fact that I know that I'm so broken that I cannot do it without my one and only Jesus Christ who is so faithful and answers prayers. I had friends and family praying for me as well, and I am so appreciative for their support! Through my experience I got achieved one one of my goals, but it was the most important of all. To get closer to God.

I was able to see how weak I really am, but people! God is soooo amazing and will always be there for you. I know one day I will receive complete victory through Him. But it's not my timing, it's His. And when that day comes, I will be a living testimony of how God can change  people's lives.

Thank you for walking with me in this journey. I will continue another Blog..not really about anything in particular. Only what God places on my heart. So continue to join along and follow my Blog: My Heart is His.  

I praise God for His majestic works and for all of you. I will continue to pray for all of you and pray that God will move and touch each and every one of your hearts.

I Surrender <><

Buon Festa Della Donna --Happy Woman's Day!

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When I studied abroad in Florence, Italy last semester, I remember walking out of my front door  and seeing street vendors selling yellow flowers called mimosas. My curiosity soon increased when I saw this happening everywhere around Florence and also in Italy! These pretty flowers were meant to be given to woman everywhere, normally bought by their husband or significant other. 

"Women’s Day has its roots in two events that took place outside of Italy. On March 8, 1857 a strike by garment workers in New York, led to the formation of the first women's union in the United States. Sixty years later Russian women led a strike calling for "bread and peace" during the twin horrors of World War I and the Russian Revolution. In 1945 the Union of Italian Women declared that this special date, March 8, should be set aside to celebrate womanhood across the country."*

Italian feminists chose Mimosas as the symbol of the holiday in 1946, to mark the first occasion of the holiday after the end of World War II. Its bright color and fragrant scent are reasons for why this specific flower was chosen. Another reason is because it is in bloom at this time of year and is inexpensive.**

I decided to celebrate Festa della Donna here in the United States as well! I wanted to give mimosas to my mom in appreciation for all she does. Unfortunately, each flower and garden shop I called didn't have mimosas! So my little 8 yr. old sister, Hannah, and I made do with what we could and instead we made construction paper mimosas, which in my opinion look better ;)

Proverbs 31:25-26

 "She is clothed with strength and dignity;
   she can laugh at the days to come.
 She speaks with wisdom,
   and faithful instruction is on her tongue." 

^{Let's continue to be women of noble character, always clothed with the strength and dignity of Jesus Christ.}

^{<>< I Surrender}
 

*Retrieved from http://www.lifeinitaly.com/culture/festa-della-donna.asp
**Retrieved from http://www.charmingitaly.com/tag/festa-della-donna/

I can't give up.



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"But as for you, be strong and do not give up, and your work will be rewarded." 2 Chronicles 15:7

Well let's just say that my Maker's Diet experience thus far has been quite the rocky road. I've really struggled completely denying myself during the first phase which caused me to want to overeat or crave sweets, which I hadn't in a long time. I messed up and then would get back on track..this was a repeating cycle. Though the intentions of the diet are great, it may not be realistic for my bank account,nor my time schedule.

I'm not giving up though.

I will be skipping to phase three in hopes for the diet to be more affordable and for me to eat better portions. It started becoming only a diet rather than wanting to glorify God with the way I eat and treat my body. So I continue to pray that God will continue to transform me and my desires to better please Him. Whewww this is harder than I thought!

The amazing thing is that God will never give up on us, no matter how many times we fail or how much we struggle. We have a forgiving, gracious God.

<>< I Surrender

Men see appearance as number ONE insecurity in women.

"I wait quietly on God, my victory comes from Him." Psalm 62:1

Our culture rubs beauty in our face 24/7 through TV, radio, grocery stores, magazines, friends, EVERYTHING. It's no wonder so many have eating disorders, body image problems, insecurities and more!

In Beth Moore's book, "So Long Insecurities," she asks men "What is the most common way you notice insecurity in women?" Guess what the answer was!? 

The majority said that women are most insecure in the area of APPEARANCE! 

And girls are sooo obvious about their insecurities when it comes to appearance. Have you ever talked to someone and watched them look you up and down, checking out your outfit, hair, etc. I have seen it numerous times, and it's so funny because girls do it without even realizing it. And even guys realize that we do it!

Here's one of the guys responses when asked about woman's insecurities:

"Most obvious is when women are around other women they try to size each other up and look for reasons to not get along rather than to get along. They seem easily intimidated, whether by physical beauty, character status, or whatever makes them feel that the other woman has more going for her,and a barrier goes up" (Moore, 231).

Another thing I've noticed that girls do and, I've caught myself doing this as well, is when girls are in a group and one of the girls is getting complimented, the others (in the back of their minds) start to compare themselves and wonder why they aren't getting complimented as well. 

We should instead look at the girl getting the compliment and see her beautiful God given characteristics as a blessing, but also value ourselves the same. So we need to pray to STOP comparing ourselves and instead compare ourselves to Christ. 

We obviously will not be anything near His flawless perfection, but are called to be imitators of Christ to advance His kingdom and take as many people to heaven with us as possible. Beauty is temporary, but God given beauty, the joy that you see in someone when they are so in love with God, is eternal beauty. Let's all strive for eternal beauty!


"The Creator of heaven and earth assigned us dignity and immeasurable value, and only when we finally accept those inalienable truths will we discover authentic security" (Moore, 238).

So what are you waiting for??? 
Give it to God, and He will take care of the rest :)

As for a Maker's Diet update. 

This week has had its ups and downs, but I saw the power and self-control that God gave me when I fully relied on Him. When I prayed and read His word, it was easy. When I was distracted, that is when I found it to be difficult. 

Planning is key to this diet. Since campus is limited on foods that I can eat, I've definitely been trying new recipes and cooking more, which is good because I need to start learning how to cook more things! The only downside is it's time consuming.

Another thing I realized was I know exactly why American's have such a high obesity rate. It's because it's so hard to find non processed, organic foods, that aren't expensive! It's close to impossible sometimes! But I'm managing :)

I will admit that my weakness was and is almonds and almond butter. I need to pray and have more self-control when it comes to those two things because I'm using them as my 'snack' and to satisfy my cravings just a little too much. 

I also found out that JAVA city has Organic Indonesian Dragon coffee which is the only other thing I can drink besides water. Sooo I'm trying to acquire the taste of BLACK COFFEE (blahh) when I need a little pick me up for class. 

So 4 days down and 36 days to go!! 

<>< I Surrender
God give me strength these next 36 days/the rest of my life to eat in moderation, have self-control and NUMBER ONE get closer to you and find my value and beauty in you!

Day 1 of 40

"Let us not become weary in doing good for at the proper time we will reap what we harvest." Galatians 6:9
 
Today I began phase one. It went well, but I've discovered some 

Obstacles

-Buying organic is expensive!
-JMU's dining halls restrict what I can eat during phase 1
-I'm not the most creative cook...but it's forcing me to learn
-It's time consuming having to cook most of my meals
-Though I eat healthy, I still need to learn to stop when I'm full
-I have to cheat every Tuesday at lunch because I'm taking an Italian cooking class
-No more cappucino's :(
-Goat's milk/yogurt is NO WHERE to be found in Harrisonburg
-I had an avocado with salsa tonight and really MISSED my lime tortilla chips

Praises

-Every time I felt the urge to think about outward appearance, I prayed and gave it to God
-God is molding me and teaching me ALREADY
-My salmon was superb :)




I'm still anxious and ready to see what God has in store for me over the next 40 days. I pray for obedience, self control and faith that He will give me the strength to reach victory.


When we call, God hears us. Present your requests to God, with the right motives to glorify Him, and He will give you the desires of your heart.


<>< I Surrender

A Revelation from God

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth." Psalm 139: 13-15

I walked into Intevarsity's Woman's Conference, on February 19, 2011, knowing that our speaker, Janelle Rardon, would be speaking about "A Divine Invitation: Hearing God's call for your life." I thought, 'wow, this is perfect, especially since I'll be graduating in May.' I expected God to really show me my call for my life. Instead I learned that God's call is a "divine invitation to embrace the salvation of God." His calling is not our works; those are our gifts. It is amazing to know that God will use my gifts and talents to embrace His calling for my life, to embrace the salvation of God and do everything to glorify His name. Little did I know that God would give me a revelation...

Though I did learn about God's calling for my life, what I didn't expect was God to reveal an area in my life where I have been broken (more like shattered) for 9 years now. He showed me that I find value and confidence in my outward appearance more than I find value in the way God sees me. WOW. Let me just tell you this may seem simple, but I didn't realize the extent to which it holds me in bondage and restricts me from having the joy to be a light and follow Jesus Christ. 

There was a moment in the conference where we could pray silently, and there were people around the room that we could go to that would pray with us.  God just kept laying on my heart how much He wants me to find my value in Him, instead of culture's standards and others affirmations about me. During this time of prayer, I was brought to tears because of this revelation! I mean 9 years! And I'm just now seeing this...but God's perfect timing is truly amazing. A friend of mine, Helen Crane, prayed over me. Through my tears and her prayers, God showed me my brokenness and how I CANNOT DO IT WITHOUT HIM. The peace I felt after that prayer was indescribable. 

So yes, while the goals that I want out of the Maker's Diet are still true, it is now so so much more. Yesterday was a turning point in my life and now the healing begins. Not only do I want to honor God with my body, but I am ready for Him to heal me from my value in beauty and outward appearance. Now I can have the peace in knowing that I'm not on my own and God's strength and peace will surpass my thoughts and actions. Wow, how beautiful it is to know that Jesus Christ died for our sins and cares for and loves us so much. 

Draw near to Him. He can heal you from whatever brokenness you may be dealing with, no matter how strong of bondage it has on you and your life. We serve an amazing, gracious God.

<>< I Surrender
 

What is the Maker's Diet?

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 "Read This Book if...
1. You want to avoid disease and live as healthy as possible with abundant energy and improved physical appearance.
2. You are suffering from disease, feel hopeless, and doubt if you will ever get well, and all the specialists you have seen offer no answers." MD

I fall under category one, but the author of this book, Jordan Rubin, falls under category two. Here's his story...
 
The author's story* 

The Maker's Diet is a book written by Jordan Rubin who was inspired to write this book because at the age of 19 he became very sick.

In 1994, he was diagnosed with Crohn's colitis. Jordan's immune system began to fail, and He suffered from intestinal parasites, severe Candida, extreme anemia, food allergies, diabetes, excruciating abdominal pain, chronic diarrhea, poor circulation, liver problems, chemical sensitivities, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, arthritis, insomnia, hair loss, prostate and bladder, infections, irregular heartbeat, eye inflammation, and chronic depression. 

You name it, it seems like Dr. Rubin had it. He became desperate after his weight dropped from 180 lbs to a low of 104 lbs at a height of 6'1''. Traveling to more than 7 countries, visiting over 70 health professions, and trying more than 300 supplements, nothing seemed to make him feel better.

In 1996, Jordan stopped using all supplements, stopped going to doctors and began an intense study of nutrition. His diet consisted of nothing but whole, living, enzyme and probiotic rich foods and Homeostatic Soil Organisms.

Within four months, Jordan's weight returned and his body began to heal itself. It has been six years since his recovery, and he has had no symptoms of the disease that almost killed him.

The Maker's Diet 

The maker's diet is a 40 day diet based on the Bible and is scientifically proven to improve the health of the entire body. It is designed to attack insulin, infection, and inflammation. Throughout the book, Jordan explains the diet of American culture and how it has veered away from the Bible. He explains every scientific detail of our body and describes the cleansing process. He talks about ways to get sick, advantages and disadvantages of various diets, and much much more. 

What happens during the 40 days of doing the Maker's Diet?

The diet is divided into three phases. 

Phase 1 is designed to stabilize insulin and blood sugar, reduce inflammation, reduce infection, enhance digestion, and help balance the hormones in your body. 

During this phase, it restricts disaccharide-rich carb foods such as grains, pastas, breads, sugar, potatoes, corn, beans and legumes.

Phase 2 A greater variety of foods are added to the diet, including fruit, nuts and seeds. During this phase, continued excess weight loss will occur. The health goal is not to achieve dramatic weight loss, but to continue to move toward the ideal weight while enjoying  great benefits of enhanced health.

Phase 3 is the maintenance phase of the diet. It is design to allow and encourage healthful eating of foods from each food group. In this phase, grain foods and foods higher in sugars and starches are added. At this phase, one will have managed to establish considerable self-control, making it much easier not to cheat.

The book says phase 1 is the hardest. So during this time, I hope to feel more energized, use God as my support system, lose weight and gain more self-control. I'll be starting Monday!

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised!" Proverbs 31:30

<>< I Surrender 


*(http://www.makers-diet.net/storybehindbook.htm)
*MD-Information taken from the Maker's Diet book, along with the majority of the information in this post.